I know it has been a while since I’ve touched based with you. My life has been a whirlwind of change and the accompanying emotional chaos. One thing I have realized about being a highly creative person is that I am always blooming with ideas and have my hands in far too many pots. I released my third CD Emergence last winter, am working on a new book, which is slow in the development, and also attempting to purchase the home on twenty acres that we are renting so that we can create a healing retreat center for people to come and have one-on-one healing sessions in a quiet, sacred environment.
In addition we have had people at our home for two months straight. Family visiting for my son’s highschool graduation, WWOOFERs here to help us plant our vegetable garden and clean up the property, friends on vacation and more family on vacation. I always loved the idea of having a place where people could come and heal, but at the same time I realize how much I need my peace in order to create and accomplish anything. So at the moment I am seeking balance and finding a way to create the retreat for part-time guests and also have plenty of time each month for myself and my work.
My work has been another area of confusion in my life. I love the work I am doing with narcissism and empowering women but there are times I need a break from having my life be about narcissism. Like many of you, the more I understand narcissism the more I see it around me. I am now convinced it is a worldwide epidemic.
As a spiritual seeker I have had to really go within and reflect on the issue of narcissism in our world. I have seen it in my love life, in my friendships, in my family, extended family, workplace, and also corporate America, the church and our government. I have seen people who seem to be bi-polar but have strong narcissistic characteristics. I have seen those characteristics in my own teenage son and many of my clients express concern over those same characteristics in their teenagers. I call it teenage narcissism.
Last winter I was interviewed by a woman on a radio show in Vancouver B.C. on the topic of narcissism. But when she started asking all the common questions about narcissism I found that I just couldn’t answer them the same way anymore. I knew that narcissism extended well beyond the personality disorder we all know about. It is more than a personality disorder. It is a spiritual disorder. This is why so many of you are not finding relief by visiting a psychologist. Although there is a strong psychological element, there is something far deeper going on. I’ve known this for a long time but as I go deeper into my work with narcissism I go deeper into my understanding that we are dealing with nothing short of a spiritual crisis in our world. Narcissism is the epitome of our lack of humanity.
I look at the Gulf Oil Spill and BP’s attitude of “Oh the Gulf of Mexico is a big Ocean why are you getting your panties in a wad?” There is that strong attempt to suppress our deep concern for the destruction of our planet. But we also need to stop and look at our own contribution to the sickness by looking at our dependency on what these large corporate entities provide us, like fossil fuels. Are we really ready to go out into the world tomorrow without gasoline for our vehicles? Are we willing to change our life so much that we no longer need the things government and Big Corporation provide?
It seems we are just as dependent upon the narcissistic entity to keep us comfortably numb in our material world as the narcissistic entity is upon us to support it. It is a symbiotic relationship where the narcissist not only needs what we have, but we need what he has. On a personal level I see that our major hook is our need to be admired, approved of, showered with attention, and made to believe we are special. We get that initially! We also get the promise of spiritual salvation from the church, the promise of security, hope and change from the government, the promise of health from the medical/pharmaceutical industries and the promise of progress and simplified life from big Corporation. But truly they are all empty promises. The more we put our faith in these outside entities the more we are misled.
Our personal experience with narcissism, the one that brought you to my Website is only a microcosm of the macrocosm. We are having the opportunity to experience what narcissism really looks like up close and personal. It is destructive! It cares nothing for humanity! It has no basis in love, caring, compassion or empathy. It is the expression of the worn out, dying patriarchal energy that has created an extreme lack of balance on our planet.
But the good news is that things are really shifting. I see this too. I see all these women coming to me that are going through their own process of spiritual awakening. They are stepping into their power and refusing to be unconscious. And there are many men who are writing to me as well and sharing their experiences of letting go of narcissistic mates. Because whether one is a man or a woman that patriarchal narcissistic energy can take root and control one’s life. I notice more narcissism in men than women because men are more conditioned to be narcissistic. The masculine nature is more rooted in the intellect, physical strength, extroverted, dominant and outwardly materialistic. The feminine nature is more intuitive, introverted, compassionate, empathetic, nurturing and inwardly spiritualistic. Yet both men and women possess masculine and feminine characteristics. And as our world evolves we are moving towards the balance of the masculine and feminine energies not only within each one of us, but also on our planet.
Because we are moving towards this masculine/feminine balance the age of patriarchal control and domination is coming to an end. But whenever something is in its last days it seems to get stronger, bigger, darker and more visible. And this is why we are seeing a surge in narcissism all over the planet.
Along with the surge in narcissism, however, is the emergence of the feminine. The feminine is finding its voice, is taking back its power and realizing that those qualities of nurturing, compassion, empathy, and intuition are crucial for the survival of our planet. The lion sleeps no more! The lioness is coming out and we hear her roar! She is the mother bear who will no longer stand by and allow the patriarchal, narcissistic energies to destroy our planet. And if you are one of those women, or men, who are waking up from a long, deep sleep to find that the one you have been sleeping with is plagued by narcissism, then you have work to do. This work is not just personal! It is global! By waking up, stepping fully into your power, finding your voice and also your purpose for being here, you are contributing to the emergence of the feminine into her rightful place alongside the masculine. We are no longer allowing ourselves to be dominated, controlled, suppressed, and made to feel we are somehow inferior! That game is over! It is time to be who you have come here to be.
As I step back and look at what I have been doing in the past year I see my CD “Emergence” which is the soundtrack for the emerging feminine energy. I see the work I am doing with narcissism which truly is more about facilitating the emergence of the feminine energy. I also see my passion and focus on natural, fresh living food and health, which is necessary for us to heal and get off the medication of processed and poisoned food provided for us by yours truly, the narcissistic corporate entity that could care less about your health. It is all important!
As we awaken we must awaken to the truth about the darkness we have been living in. We must find the strength within ourselves to unplug from the narcissistic world, and stop supporting it with our time, money and energy. And this is my focus! Helping people to unplug, to find their strength and their power, and reconnect with that feminine energy within is really what I am passionate about doing. And I invite you to consider your life and purpose as well. While in the midst of personal crisis it may seem you are without purpose. But perhaps you are really going through your own process of emergence which will take you more fully into your true self and allow you to do your part in facilitating the emergence of the feminine in a patriarchal, narcissistic world.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
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This is a fantastic article! I agree that narcissism goes beyond the romantic relationship and surfaces everywhere. I am in the process of divorcing my narcisstic husband. We have been married 25 years. I am also re-evaluating my life and listening for the next step. I do want to be a part of the balancing of energy on this planet.
ReplyDeleteThank you for all your hard work! Here's to a more peaceful world!
Susan
i have felt like i was shouting by myself to an empty arena. thank you for putting my very thoughts into words. i see the threat of greed and self importance in all aspects of our lives. i have seen it in my 30 year old daghter, who finally is starting to struggle through this and become her own person. i see our culture crumbing all around us. and if we are not a narcisstic personality, our sensitivities and humaness is ridiculed and punished. often put on meds. sent to the back of the bus, last on the employment list.
ReplyDeleteplease take this message as far as you can. that to feel and care is NORMAL! i am behind your work totally. i pray others will join. at 60 , i have seen a lot of changes. and what i see is a repeat of rome ....... thank you
sue
Hi Kaleah, you are right on with your observations. I have observed the same. I pray that humanity awakens quickly, and it will do so as more people like you are brave enough to speak the truth. Bravo!
ReplyDeleteI have seen people who seem to be bi-polarent. I have seen people who seem to be bi-polar but have strong narcissistic characteristics, but have strong narcissistic characteristics. This is my wife's situation and the drugs that they give her are dulling her mind and spirit. All illnesses have a spiritual component to them. In some cases there is demonic influence. See Scott Peck's book,"People of the lie".
ReplyDeleteHi All, I need help for my Grandmother. My mother lives with her and it's just too much to hear the stories of mental and emotional abuse that she goes through with her. My Gram's house is tiny and the one bedroom that was hers is now my mom's, and I have seen rules written down about when it's ok to talk, look, leave alone... This year she needs to move out, she is not speaking to me and gets enraged when I'm involved so I need the help of a professional someone might be able to
ReplyDeleterecommend?? Thank you